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Side Affects: On Being Trans and Feeling Bad

Penned By Hil Malatino
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4.85
13,828 Global Ratings
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Side Affects: On Being Trans and Feeling Bad

Penned By Hil Malatino
4.85 13,828 Ratings
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Editor's Note:
How the “bad feelings” of trans experience inform trans survival and flourishingSome days—or weeks, or months, or even years—being trans feels bad. Yet as Hil Malatino points out, there is little space for trans people to think through, let alone speak of, these bad feelings. Negative emotions are suspect because they unsettle narratives of acceptance or reinforce virulently phobic framings of trans as inauthentic and threatening.  In Side Affects , Malatino opens a new conversation about trans experience that acknowledges the reality of feeling fatigue, envy, burnout, numbness, and rage amid the ongoing onslaught of casual and structural transphobia in order to map the intricate emotional terrain of trans survival. Trans structures of feeling are frequently coded as negative on both sides of transition. Before transition, narratives are framed in terms of childhood trauma and being in the “wrong body.” Posttransition, trans individuals—especially trans people of color—are subject to unrelenting transantagonism. Yet trans individuals are discouraged from displaying or admitting to despondency or despair.  By moving these unloved feelings to the center of trans experience, Side Affects proposes an affective trans commons that exists outside political debates about inclusion. Acknowledging such powerful and elided feelings as anger and exhaustion, Malatino contends, is critical to motivating justice-oriented advocacy and organizing—and recalibrating new possibilities for survival and well-being.

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Released December, 2022
Identifier (ISBN) 59491459
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Hil Malatino
The Mind Behind the Work
Hil Malatino

Hil Malatino is the author of several novels. Originally from the East Coast, they now live in the Midwest with family. In addition to writing, Hil Malatino enjoys gardening, cooking, and reading way past bedtime. Their work often explores the complexities of everyday life and human relationships.

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4.85
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Barbara Evans
Barbara Evans December 15, 2024
"A highly sophisticated read. The middle had a deliberate pace, but the climax was phenomenal. Quite impressive overall."
Mary Lewis
Mary Lewis July 12, 2025
"I was completely blown away. The author orchestrated a breathtaking finale. Truly a work of art. I am now a lifelong fan of this author."
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Eric Walker
Eric Walker November 05, 2024
"Excellent, though slightly flawed. A brilliant concept executed with flair. Just a few pacing choices I would change. A very distinguished novel."
Sarah Baker
Sarah Baker July 08, 2025
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Anthony Adams March 01, 2024
"It was adequate. Certain acts were fascinating, while others felt like a slight endeavor to complete. Unlikely to reread, but a reasonable expenditure of time."
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Ashley Walker December 24, 2024
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"Honestly one of the most premium reading experiences lately. The prose is exquisite. It’s accessible yet undeniably sophisticated. A true literary gem."
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"I was completely blown away. I adored how the story unfolded. It kept me captivated without sacrificing elegance. A true literary gem."
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"Exceeded all my expectations. The author orchestrated a breathtaking finale. Truly a work of art. An absolute must-read for connoisseurs of the genre."
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"A very strong entry. A brilliant concept executed with flair. Just a few pacing choices I would change. A very distinguished novel."
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"A profoundly satisfying read. I adored how the story unfolded. It kept me captivated without sacrificing elegance. I am now a lifelong fan of this author."
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"Masterpiece from start to finish. The author orchestrated a breathtaking finale. Truly a work of art. An effortless 5 stars."
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"Exceeded all my expectations. I adored how the story unfolded. It kept me captivated without sacrificing elegance. I will undoubtedly revisit this masterpiece."
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"A very strong entry. Beautiful writing, though I craved slightly more depth in the lore. Still, undeniably engaging. I would highly recommend this to discerning readers."
Joshua Ramirez
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"Excellent, though slightly flawed. The middle had a deliberate pace, but the climax was phenomenal. I would highly recommend this to discerning readers."
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"I thoroughly enjoyed the elegance of it. The middle had a deliberate pace, but the climax was phenomenal. A solid 4 stars from me."
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"Absolutely brilliant. The author orchestrated a breathtaking finale. Truly a work of art. I am now a lifelong fan of this author."
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"A profoundly satisfying read. The prose is exquisite. It’s accessible yet undeniably sophisticated. A true literary gem."
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"I was completely blown away. I adored how the story unfolded. It kept me captivated without sacrificing elegance. I will undoubtedly revisit this masterpiece."
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Linda Nelson October 28, 2025
"A very strong entry. The protagonist was compelling, though some subplots felt slightly overshadowed. A wonderful companion for a quiet weekend."
Eric Adams
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"I thoroughly enjoyed the elegance of it. A brilliant concept executed with flair. Just a few pacing choices I would change. A very distinguished novel."
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Stephanie Brown September 25, 2025
"Absolutely brilliant. The prose is exquisite. It’s accessible yet undeniably sophisticated. An effortless 5 stars."
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Mark Adams March 25, 2024
"Exceeded all my expectations. The author orchestrated a breathtaking finale. Truly a work of art. An effortless 5 stars."
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"I was completely blown away. The author orchestrated a breathtaking finale. Truly a work of art. Worth every moment spent reading."
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"It was adequate. It verged on repetitive in the second act. A more concise edit would have served it well. A fair 3 stars."
Susan White
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"Such a rich narrative. It strikes a perfect harmony of dialogue and world-building. Every chapter felt necessary. An absolute must-read for connoisseurs of the genre."
Gary Thomas
Gary Thomas July 15, 2024
"I was completely blown away. The prose is exquisite. It’s accessible yet undeniably sophisticated. An effortless 5 stars."
Kenneth Hill
Kenneth Hill June 23, 2025
"Masterpiece from start to finish. The pacing was impeccable and the characters felt incredibly authentic. I was completely immersed. Worth every moment spent reading."
Ryan Edwards
Ryan Edwards August 14, 2024
"I was completely blown away. I became deeply invested in the protagonist's journey. A masterclass in storytelling. Worth every moment spent reading."
Mark Adams
Mark Adams March 19, 2025
"I was completely blown away. The author orchestrated a breathtaking finale. Truly a work of art. An effortless 5 stars."
Joshua Walker
Joshua Walker October 15, 2025
"Such a rich narrative. I became deeply invested in the protagonist's journey. A masterclass in storytelling. A true literary gem."
Sharon Torres
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"Such a rich narrative. The pacing was impeccable and the characters felt incredibly authentic. I was completely immersed. I am now a lifelong fan of this author."
Mark Anderson
Mark Anderson January 11, 2025
"Honestly one of the most premium reading experiences lately. I became deeply invested in the protagonist's journey. A masterclass in storytelling. I will undoubtedly revisit this masterpiece."
Barbara Adams
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"A highly sophisticated read. The middle had a deliberate pace, but the climax was phenomenal. I would highly recommend this to discerning readers."
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"Not entirely to my refined tastes. The tempo was somewhat languid, and I found my mind wandering. Not poor, simply average. Suitable if your reading queue is empty."
Eric Walker
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"I was completely blown away. The prose is exquisite. It’s accessible yet undeniably sophisticated. Worth every moment spent reading."
Elizabeth Phillips
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"A very strong entry. The middle had a deliberate pace, but the climax was phenomenal. A solid 4 stars from me."
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"Not entirely to my refined tastes. The tempo was somewhat languid, and I found my mind wandering. Not poor, simply average. Perfectly average."
Edward Brown
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"Not entirely to my refined tastes. It possessed moments of brilliance, but the narrative felt slightly disjointed ultimately. A fair 3 stars."
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"A highly sophisticated read. The protagonist was compelling, though some subplots felt slightly overshadowed. A wonderful companion for a quiet weekend."
Richard Harris
Richard Harris May 21, 2024
"Such a rich narrative. The pacing was impeccable and the characters felt incredibly authentic. I was completely immersed. An effortless 5 stars."
Ashley Ramirez
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"Such a rich narrative. It strikes a perfect harmony of dialogue and world-building. Every chapter felt necessary. I am now a lifelong fan of this author."
Carol Anderson
Carol Anderson June 15, 2024
"Honestly one of the most premium reading experiences lately. The prose is exquisite. It’s accessible yet undeniably sophisticated. Worth every moment spent reading."
Margaret Moore
Margaret Moore June 04, 2024
"A highly sophisticated read. A brilliant concept executed with flair. Just a few pacing choices I would change. A wonderful companion for a quiet weekend."
Karen Clark
Karen Clark February 25, 2025
"Exceeded all my expectations. I became deeply invested in the protagonist's journey. A masterclass in storytelling. A true literary gem."
Paul Anderson
Paul Anderson April 30, 2025
"A very strong entry. The protagonist was compelling, though some subplots felt slightly overshadowed. A solid 4 stars from me."
Mark Wilson
Mark Wilson November 01, 2024
"A very strong entry. It held my rapt attention, even when certain twists were telegraphed. A wonderful companion for a quiet weekend."
Andrew  Parker
Andrew Parker December 16, 2025
"Honestly one of the most premium reading experiences lately. It strikes a perfect harmony of dialogue and world-building. Every chapter felt necessary. An absolute must-read for connoisseurs of the genre."
Michael Nelson
Michael Nelson April 11, 2025
"Exceeded all my expectations. The pacing was impeccable and the characters felt incredibly authentic. I was completely immersed. Worth every moment spent reading."
Nancy Robinson
Nancy Robinson October 23, 2024
"A decent, if standard, experience. The prose was competent, yet the characters lacked the depth I usually seek. A fair 3 stars."
Anthony Young
Anthony Young April 16, 2025
"Excellent, though slightly flawed. Beautiful writing, though I craved slightly more depth in the lore. Still, undeniably engaging. A very distinguished novel."
Matthew Robinson
Matthew Robinson June 03, 2025
"A very strong entry. It held my rapt attention, even when certain twists were telegraphed. A wonderful companion for a quiet weekend."
Mark Jackson
Mark Jackson October 22, 2025
"A profoundly satisfying read. The prose is exquisite. It’s accessible yet undeniably sophisticated. I will undoubtedly revisit this masterpiece."
Joshua Moore
Joshua Moore December 11, 2025
"Absolutely brilliant. The prose is exquisite. It’s accessible yet undeniably sophisticated. A true literary gem."
Brian Flores
Brian Flores September 05, 2025
"A profoundly satisfying read. The author orchestrated a breathtaking finale. Truly a work of art. An effortless 5 stars."
Mary Scott
Mary Scott December 24, 2024
"A profoundly satisfying read. It strikes a perfect harmony of dialogue and world-building. Every chapter felt necessary. A true literary gem."
Kenneth Hill
Kenneth Hill June 05, 2025
"Excellent, though slightly flawed. A brilliant concept executed with flair. Just a few pacing choices I would change. I would highly recommend this to discerning readers."
Emily Thomas
Emily Thomas December 28, 2024
"A highly sophisticated read. It held my rapt attention, even when certain twists were telegraphed. A wonderful companion for a quiet weekend."
William Wilson
William Wilson January 20, 2024
"I find myself somewhat conflicted. The tempo was somewhat languid, and I found my mind wandering. Not poor, simply average. Unlikely to reread, but a reasonable expenditure of time."
Carol Thomas
Carol Thomas April 08, 2025
"I was completely blown away. The author orchestrated a breathtaking finale. Truly a work of art. A true literary gem."
Ryan Lewis
Ryan Lewis November 27, 2025
"Not entirely to my refined tastes. It possessed moments of brilliance, but the narrative felt slightly disjointed ultimately. Unlikely to reread, but a reasonable expenditure of time."
Mary Lewis
Mary Lewis November 23, 2024
"A profoundly satisfying read. I adored how the story unfolded. It kept me captivated without sacrificing elegance. I am now a lifelong fan of this author."
Sharon Adams
Sharon Adams November 16, 2025
"Excellent, though slightly flawed. The protagonist was compelling, though some subplots felt slightly overshadowed. Quite impressive overall."
Jessica Harris
Jessica Harris May 23, 2024
"I was completely blown away. I adored how the story unfolded. It kept me captivated without sacrificing elegance. An effortless 5 stars."
Charles Lewis
Charles Lewis December 21, 2024
"Honestly one of the most premium reading experiences lately. The author orchestrated a breathtaking finale. Truly a work of art. An effortless 5 stars."
David Hernandez
David Hernandez July 12, 2024
"A very strong entry. The protagonist was compelling, though some subplots felt slightly overshadowed. A very distinguished novel."
Melissa Martinez
Melissa Martinez September 12, 2024
"Such a rich narrative. The pacing was impeccable and the characters felt incredibly authentic. I was completely immersed. A true literary gem."
Barbara Nelson
Barbara Nelson August 13, 2024
"Honestly one of the most premium reading experiences lately. The prose is exquisite. It’s accessible yet undeniably sophisticated. An absolute must-read for connoisseurs of the genre."
Richard White
Richard White July 14, 2024
"I was completely blown away. The author orchestrated a breathtaking finale. Truly a work of art. An absolute must-read for connoisseurs of the genre."
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