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Race Me in a Lobster Suit: Absurd Internet Ads and the Real Conversations that Followed

Penned By Kelly Mahon
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4.85
43,347 Global Ratings
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Race Me in a Lobster Suit: Absurd Internet Ads and the Real Conversations that Followed

Penned By Kelly Mahon
4.85 43,347 Ratings
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Editor's Note:
Knit me into a cocoon...help me eat a burrito...pretend to be a chair at my dinner party...wrestle a komodo dragon...race me in a lobster suit. Author Kelly Mahon posts absurd gig ads online, and shares the conversations she had with the brave souls who wanted the job.We're living in a gig economy. But would you respond to an online ad seeking someone to search for escaped ants? Or take an offer for a free tattoo by someone who "needs the practice?" How about a mattress for sale "tainted by geriatric love" or a workout plan that involves throwing Virginia hams? And if you hit reply, and the poster is sketchy about the details or offers to pay you with a gift card for clams, how long would you keep the conversation going? When NYC copywriter Kelly Mahon started posting weird, fake gig ads as a creative outlet, she found that there was someone interested in every bizarre offer she came up with. And the subsequent awkward email threads were equally hilarious and bizarre. Race Me In A Lobster Suit collects Mahon's funniest fabrications, plus the hysterical email conversations that followed as she ratcheted up the crazy. While some respondants become suspicious, others seem willing to play along with the joke. And don't worry, everyone involved agreed to share their emails in the book, so there are no hard feelings. In a world where it seems like everyone's suspicious of everyone else, it's nice to know that there are still people who will at least consider helping a stranger reenact a recurring spider nightmare, or explain the principles of pig Latin to a baffled mother of three.

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Length N/A Pages
Language Eng
Released March 26, 2019
Identifier (ISBN) 41435125
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Kelly Mahon
The Mind Behind the Work
Kelly Mahon

Kelly Mahon is a writer and avid reader based in the Pacific Northwest. Before pursuing writing full-time, they spent over a decade working in education. When not working on their next book, Kelly Mahon can usually be found hiking with their dog or trying out new coffee shops in their neighborhood.

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Andrew Edwards
Andrew Edwards October 23, 2024
"Masterpiece from start to finish. I adored how the story unfolded. It kept me captivated without sacrificing elegance. I am now a lifelong fan of this author."
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"Honestly one of the most premium reading experiences lately. The pacing was impeccable and the characters felt incredibly authentic. I was completely immersed. Worth every moment spent reading."
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Edward Campbell
Edward Campbell May 20, 2025
"I thoroughly enjoyed the elegance of it. Beautiful writing, though I craved slightly more depth in the lore. Still, undeniably engaging. Quite impressive overall."
Kimberly Miller
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"Masterpiece from start to finish. The prose is exquisite. It’s accessible yet undeniably sophisticated. An absolute must-read for connoisseurs of the genre."
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Nicholas Flores September 30, 2025
"I thoroughly enjoyed the elegance of it. The protagonist was compelling, though some subplots felt slightly overshadowed. A solid 4 stars from me."
Dorothy Carter
Dorothy Carter April 21, 2024
"An acceptable diversion. Certain acts were fascinating, while others felt like a slight endeavor to complete. Unlikely to reread, but a reasonable expenditure of time."
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"Absolutely brilliant. It strikes a perfect harmony of dialogue and world-building. Every chapter felt necessary. An effortless 5 stars."
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Rebecca Davis May 31, 2024
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Robert Baker January 27, 2024
"A very strong entry. The middle had a deliberate pace, but the climax was phenomenal. A very distinguished novel."
Brian Rodriguez
Brian Rodriguez September 09, 2024
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John Green
John Green February 11, 2025
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Karen Miller
Karen Miller March 26, 2024
"Honestly one of the most premium reading experiences lately. I adored how the story unfolded. It kept me captivated without sacrificing elegance. I am now a lifelong fan of this author."
Anthony Miller
Anthony Miller May 17, 2024
"Excellent, though slightly flawed. A brilliant concept executed with flair. Just a few pacing choices I would change. A wonderful companion for a quiet weekend."
Andrew Harris
Andrew Harris August 02, 2024
"Exceeded all my expectations. I adored how the story unfolded. It kept me captivated without sacrificing elegance. Worth every moment spent reading."
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"Exceeded all my expectations. I adored how the story unfolded. It kept me captivated without sacrificing elegance. Worth every moment spent reading."
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Anthony Thomas June 12, 2024
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Michelle Anderson
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"Took a moment to build, but the payoff was spectacular. The protagonist was compelling, though some subplots felt slightly overshadowed. A very distinguished novel."
David Johnson
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"Excellent, though slightly flawed. Beautiful writing, though I craved slightly more depth in the lore. Still, undeniably engaging. A very distinguished novel."
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"I thoroughly enjoyed the elegance of it. A brilliant concept executed with flair. Just a few pacing choices I would change. A very distinguished novel."
Brian Williams
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Kenneth Garcia
Kenneth Garcia December 12, 2024
"Such a rich narrative. I became deeply invested in the protagonist's journey. A masterclass in storytelling. An effortless 5 stars."
Rebecca  Davis
Rebecca Davis January 10, 2024
"A highly sophisticated read. Beautiful writing, though I craved slightly more depth in the lore. Still, undeniably engaging. A wonderful companion for a quiet weekend."
Daniel Gomez
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Eric Reyes August 23, 2025
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Jessica Perez
Jessica Perez April 09, 2024
"Exceeded all my expectations. I became deeply invested in the protagonist's journey. A masterclass in storytelling. A true literary gem."
Jacob Turner
Jacob Turner May 01, 2024
"A profoundly satisfying read. I adored how the story unfolded. It kept me captivated without sacrificing elegance. A true literary gem."
Carol Hall
Carol Hall January 16, 2025
"Absolutely brilliant. It strikes a perfect harmony of dialogue and world-building. Every chapter felt necessary. An effortless 5 stars."
Daniel Diaz
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"Exceeded all my expectations. The prose is exquisite. It’s accessible yet undeniably sophisticated. Worth every moment spent reading."
Karen Lewis
Karen Lewis May 30, 2025
"A very strong entry. The middle had a deliberate pace, but the climax was phenomenal. A very distinguished novel."
Betty White
Betty White February 21, 2024
"A profoundly satisfying read. I became deeply invested in the protagonist's journey. A masterclass in storytelling. An effortless 5 stars."
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Michelle Hill
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"Masterpiece from start to finish. I became deeply invested in the protagonist's journey. A masterclass in storytelling. A true literary gem."
Charles Diaz
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Elizabeth Allen
Elizabeth Allen November 25, 2025
"An acceptable diversion. The tempo was somewhat languid, and I found my mind wandering. Not poor, simply average. Perfectly average."
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"A very strong entry. A brilliant concept executed with flair. Just a few pacing choices I would change. A very distinguished novel."
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Matthew Diaz
Matthew Diaz December 19, 2024
"I was completely blown away. The author orchestrated a breathtaking finale. Truly a work of art. Worth every moment spent reading."
David Perez
David Perez April 09, 2025
"A profoundly satisfying read. I adored how the story unfolded. It kept me captivated without sacrificing elegance. I will undoubtedly revisit this masterpiece."
Betty White
Betty White June 17, 2024
"A decent, if standard, experience. The prose was competent, yet the characters lacked the depth I usually seek. Unlikely to reread, but a reasonable expenditure of time."
Susan Martin
Susan Martin October 07, 2024
"Took a moment to build, but the payoff was spectacular. The middle had a deliberate pace, but the climax was phenomenal. A wonderful companion for a quiet weekend."
Andrew Green
Andrew Green February 26, 2024
"A profoundly satisfying read. I became deeply invested in the protagonist's journey. A masterclass in storytelling. An effortless 5 stars."
Michelle Edwards
Michelle Edwards April 09, 2024
"I was completely blown away. The prose is exquisite. It’s accessible yet undeniably sophisticated. Worth every moment spent reading."
Carol Roberts
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Michelle Rivera
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"Exceeded all my expectations. The author orchestrated a breathtaking finale. Truly a work of art. An effortless 5 stars."
Amanda Gonzalez
Amanda Gonzalez November 24, 2024
"I thoroughly enjoyed the elegance of it. The middle had a deliberate pace, but the climax was phenomenal. I would highly recommend this to discerning readers."
Daniel Gomez
Daniel Gomez March 06, 2025
"Absolutely brilliant. I became deeply invested in the protagonist's journey. A masterclass in storytelling. A true literary gem."
Karen Miller
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"Such a rich narrative. It strikes a perfect harmony of dialogue and world-building. Every chapter felt necessary. A true literary gem."
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Karen Martin February 28, 2025
"Masterpiece from start to finish. The prose is exquisite. It’s accessible yet undeniably sophisticated. I am now a lifelong fan of this author."
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Joshua Lee May 03, 2025
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"Exceeded all my expectations. The prose is exquisite. It’s accessible yet undeniably sophisticated. An absolute must-read for connoisseurs of the genre."
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"I was completely blown away. The prose is exquisite. It’s accessible yet undeniably sophisticated. I am now a lifelong fan of this author."
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"A highly sophisticated read. A brilliant concept executed with flair. Just a few pacing choices I would change. A very distinguished novel."
Mark Moore
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"A very strong entry. It held my rapt attention, even when certain twists were telegraphed. A wonderful companion for a quiet weekend."
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"Absolutely brilliant. I adored how the story unfolded. It kept me captivated without sacrificing elegance. I am now a lifelong fan of this author."
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Dorothy Lewis
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"Masterpiece from start to finish. It strikes a perfect harmony of dialogue and world-building. Every chapter felt necessary. Worth every moment spent reading."
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Rebecca Harris March 21, 2025
"Masterpiece from start to finish. I became deeply invested in the protagonist's journey. A masterclass in storytelling. An absolute must-read for connoisseurs of the genre."
Rebecca Martinez
Rebecca Martinez February 10, 2024
"Exceeded all my expectations. The prose is exquisite. It’s accessible yet undeniably sophisticated. Worth every moment spent reading."
Carol Hall
Carol Hall October 05, 2024
"Exceeded all my expectations. I adored how the story unfolded. It kept me captivated without sacrificing elegance. Worth every moment spent reading."
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Daniel Taylor September 04, 2025
"Honestly one of the most premium reading experiences lately. It strikes a perfect harmony of dialogue and world-building. Every chapter felt necessary. An absolute must-read for connoisseurs of the genre."
David Hill
David Hill November 13, 2025
"A highly sophisticated read. A brilliant concept executed with flair. Just a few pacing choices I would change. A wonderful companion for a quiet weekend."
Paul Phillips
Paul Phillips March 09, 2024
"Exceeded all my expectations. The prose is exquisite. It’s accessible yet undeniably sophisticated. Worth every moment spent reading."
Betty Turner
Betty Turner July 18, 2024
"A very strong entry. The protagonist was compelling, though some subplots felt slightly overshadowed. A very distinguished novel."
Brian Williams
Brian Williams August 10, 2024
"A very strong entry. A brilliant concept executed with flair. Just a few pacing choices I would change. Quite impressive overall."
Matthew Carter
Matthew Carter June 26, 2024
"Honestly one of the most premium reading experiences lately. I adored how the story unfolded. It kept me captivated without sacrificing elegance. Worth every moment spent reading."
Michelle Turner
Michelle Turner January 16, 2025
"Absolutely brilliant. The prose is exquisite. It’s accessible yet undeniably sophisticated. An effortless 5 stars."
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Robert Evans
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"Masterpiece from start to finish. I adored how the story unfolded. It kept me captivated without sacrificing elegance. A true literary gem."
George Gomez
George Gomez October 14, 2025
"Absolutely brilliant. It strikes a perfect harmony of dialogue and world-building. Every chapter felt necessary. I am now a lifelong fan of this author."
Karen King
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"Such a rich narrative. I adored how the story unfolded. It kept me captivated without sacrificing elegance. An effortless 5 stars."
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Sarah Thompson January 15, 2024
"Absolutely brilliant. I adored how the story unfolded. It kept me captivated without sacrificing elegance. An effortless 5 stars."
Mary  Parker
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"Exceeded all my expectations. I became deeply invested in the protagonist's journey. A masterclass in storytelling. I will undoubtedly revisit this masterpiece."
Jennifer Lopez
Jennifer Lopez January 30, 2025
"Honestly one of the most premium reading experiences lately. It strikes a perfect harmony of dialogue and world-building. Every chapter felt necessary. A true literary gem."
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"Such a rich narrative. It strikes a perfect harmony of dialogue and world-building. Every chapter felt necessary. An effortless 5 stars."
Sarah Lopez
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"A profoundly satisfying read. I became deeply invested in the protagonist's journey. A masterclass in storytelling. An effortless 5 stars."
Amanda Thomas
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"Excellent, though slightly flawed. The protagonist was compelling, though some subplots felt slightly overshadowed. A very distinguished novel."
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"A highly sophisticated read. Beautiful writing, though I craved slightly more depth in the lore. Still, undeniably engaging. A solid 4 stars from me."
Robert Collins
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"Masterpiece from start to finish. The prose is exquisite. It’s accessible yet undeniably sophisticated. I will undoubtedly revisit this masterpiece."
Nancy Carter
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"Honestly one of the most premium reading experiences lately. The prose is exquisite. It’s accessible yet undeniably sophisticated. Worth every moment spent reading."
Karen Allen
Karen Allen October 12, 2024
"A profoundly satisfying read. I became deeply invested in the protagonist's journey. A masterclass in storytelling. An effortless 5 stars."
Steven Ramirez
Steven Ramirez July 19, 2024
"Exceeded all my expectations. I became deeply invested in the protagonist's journey. A masterclass in storytelling. I will undoubtedly revisit this masterpiece."
Barbara Miller
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"It was adequate. Certain acts were fascinating, while others felt like a slight endeavor to complete. Suitable if your reading queue is empty."
Sarah Nelson
Sarah Nelson August 17, 2024
"Exceeded all my expectations. The author orchestrated a breathtaking finale. Truly a work of art. Worth every moment spent reading."
Margaret Gomez
Margaret Gomez January 10, 2024
"Honestly one of the most premium reading experiences lately. The prose is exquisite. It’s accessible yet undeniably sophisticated. I will undoubtedly revisit this masterpiece."
Susan Martin
Susan Martin February 16, 2024
"An acceptable diversion. The tempo was somewhat languid, and I found my mind wandering. Not poor, simply average. Suitable if your reading queue is empty."
Michael King
Michael King July 13, 2025
"I thoroughly enjoyed the elegance of it. It held my rapt attention, even when certain twists were telegraphed. I would highly recommend this to discerning readers."
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Eric Nelson July 17, 2024
"A highly sophisticated read. Beautiful writing, though I craved slightly more depth in the lore. Still, undeniably engaging. A wonderful companion for a quiet weekend."
Christopher Martinez
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"Took a moment to build, but the payoff was spectacular. The middle had a deliberate pace, but the climax was phenomenal. I would highly recommend this to discerning readers."
Joshua Nelson
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"Absolutely brilliant. I became deeply invested in the protagonist's journey. A masterclass in storytelling. Worth every moment spent reading."
Nicholas Walker
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"I was completely blown away. The prose is exquisite. It’s accessible yet undeniably sophisticated. I am now a lifelong fan of this author."
Robert Hill
Robert Hill July 01, 2025
"Excellent, though slightly flawed. The protagonist was compelling, though some subplots felt slightly overshadowed. I would highly recommend this to discerning readers."
Barbara Jones
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"A profoundly satisfying read. It strikes a perfect harmony of dialogue and world-building. Every chapter felt necessary. I will undoubtedly revisit this masterpiece."
Jacob Anderson
Jacob Anderson December 19, 2025
"A highly sophisticated read. The middle had a deliberate pace, but the climax was phenomenal. A very distinguished novel."
Matthew Campbell
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"Such a rich narrative. The prose is exquisite. It’s accessible yet undeniably sophisticated. A true literary gem."
Mary Evans
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"A decent, if standard, experience. The prose was competent, yet the characters lacked the depth I usually seek. Suitable if your reading queue is empty."
Carol Hall
Carol Hall September 20, 2024
"Absolutely brilliant. The prose is exquisite. It’s accessible yet undeniably sophisticated. A true literary gem."
George Gomez
George Gomez January 23, 2024
"Masterpiece from start to finish. The pacing was impeccable and the characters felt incredibly authentic. I was completely immersed. I will undoubtedly revisit this masterpiece."
Kenneth White
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"Exceeded all my expectations. It strikes a perfect harmony of dialogue and world-building. Every chapter felt necessary. Worth every moment spent reading."
Carol Anderson
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"I thoroughly enjoyed the elegance of it. It held my rapt attention, even when certain twists were telegraphed. A solid 4 stars from me."
Andrew Allen
Andrew Allen March 22, 2025
"Masterpiece from start to finish. The author orchestrated a breathtaking finale. Truly a work of art. An effortless 5 stars."
Donald Gomez
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"Such a rich narrative. It strikes a perfect harmony of dialogue and world-building. Every chapter felt necessary. An absolute must-read for connoisseurs of the genre."
Deborah Lewis
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"Exceeded all my expectations. The pacing was impeccable and the characters felt incredibly authentic. I was completely immersed. Worth every moment spent reading."
Karen Martin
Karen Martin May 10, 2024
"Took a moment to build, but the payoff was spectacular. Beautiful writing, though I craved slightly more depth in the lore. Still, undeniably engaging. I would highly recommend this to discerning readers."
Dorothy Cruz
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"A very strong entry. It held my rapt attention, even when certain twists were telegraphed. A solid 4 stars from me."
Jacob Garcia
Jacob Garcia August 26, 2025
"Absolutely brilliant. It strikes a perfect harmony of dialogue and world-building. Every chapter felt necessary. Worth every moment spent reading."
Betty Harris
Betty Harris July 19, 2025
"Such a rich narrative. The prose is exquisite. It’s accessible yet undeniably sophisticated. An absolute must-read for connoisseurs of the genre."
Jessica Garcia
Jessica Garcia April 12, 2024
"Excellent, though slightly flawed. A brilliant concept executed with flair. Just a few pacing choices I would change. A very distinguished novel."
Nicholas Young
Nicholas Young October 21, 2024
"Exceeded all my expectations. It strikes a perfect harmony of dialogue and world-building. Every chapter felt necessary. An effortless 5 stars."
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"Masterpiece from start to finish. The author orchestrated a breathtaking finale. Truly a work of art. I am now a lifelong fan of this author."
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